The two and a half year itch

So it’s been two and a half years since my maiden voyage from my homeland to sunny old England. With a trip to Australia now on the horizon my mind is starting to focus on all things Australian. From bus advertisements for Up and Go coming to the UK, to ramping up my annoying habit of pointing out all of the Australian actors that pop up in Film and Television shows Roberto and I are watching. To asking Sam lots of inane questions about her recent trip home along the lines of ‘What did it smell like when you got off the plane?’ To dreaming they opened up an Oporto in London only to google it upon waking and find out that there was one in Victoria station that closed before I even came over. I long for the taste of a Tim Tam on my lips, the sound of cicadas mixed with the vocal stylings of kookaburras in the summer.

I never thought of myself as a particularly patriotic person before moving to London, but now I will argue with strangers about the origins of Pavlova, Listen to ACDC, insist on a BBQ as soon as the sun comes out, throw chicken salt on everything and smugly compare everything over here to back at home. The coffee’s not as smooth, the beaches not as inviting, strangers not as friendly (Although I only seem to recall crazy people talking to me on public transport at home but that still counts)

All of this and I am literally itching! I haven’t had the best health track record over here what with chipping my ankle, getting chicken pox for the first time, migraines, lactose intolerance, unexplained viruses not to mention other female problems (without going into my full medical history over here) I’ve had some difficult times. And now that spring has sprung it seems I have a rash, a red inflamed extremely itchy rash all over my body. It all started when we moved houses recently (more on that in a future post) After suffering for a few days I disguised myself in a thin layer of make up and headed down to our local pharmacy, glowing red I triumphantly showed them my rash only to be given a cortisone cream for my body and antihistamine tablets – neither worked. It’s been two weeks now and many sleepless nights before I finally took the steps to make a doctor’s appointment (same day appointments at my surgery seem to be harder to obtain than tickets to Glastonbury) I still have no diagnosis and as we have moved I must now go through the painstaking process of registering with a new doctor in order to get a referral to a dermatologist. So yes, right now I am literally itching to get back on Australian soil once more, and am planning an epic Oprah like tour for Roberto. Hopefully by then I wont have to cover my face in a shroud to greet people as right now it looks like I’ve been stung repeatedly by bees. If anyone has any natural remedies for itching please come forward – if it’s an Australian remedy even better

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